As Dark as the Sky
by Paul1280
Summary: The life of Lily Loud hasn't been the same since her family was turn apart. Now she has to survive in a house with her two sisters who just care about themselves and an abusive mother.
1. Infamous

Those times when the sky was as cloudy as today were the perfect times to go to the park for a walk. The sun has been horrible this summer; you wouldn't want to go outside just to burn yourself with the 113 degrees temperature. However, today the clouds were covering the sun and the sky was dark, since the time was 7:00 pm, and the clouds were grey, threatening with unleash a storm at any moment. But that wouldn't keep Lily Loud from going for a walk. Any time she wanted to get out of her house she went to the park on Morgan Street; not many persons go to that zone because of its bad reputation. That park was the gathering point for addicts and dealers; the few business that were there were the kind you would expect in a hood like that. It was dangerous, but for Lily Loud it was nothing but a walk in the park.

The blonde was not a little girl anymore; she was sixteen years old with her long golden hair with that characteristic cowlick, she was wearing a pair of jeans with a pair of black converse, and she was using a long sleeve purple shirt. Her childhood years weren't the happiest of her life since her father left the house to live with another woman and her children. _"It's cheaper to support hers than yours."_ It was the last thing Lynn Sr. said before leaving the house to never return, leaving Rita on the floor crying and begging him not to go. Lily was five years old when that happened, and since that moment she knew thing would change for bad. The situation of the Loud family didn't get better; Rita became alcoholic, and whenever she wasn't working, she was drinking on her room, crying and blaming her daughters for making her husband leave. The elder sisters, since Lori to Lucy, left the house when they turned eighteen, leaving her and her sisters trapped in that asylum.

As years passed, Lily was growing up with resentment towards her elder sisters for leave her, towards her father for change them for another family, towards her mother for not being the adult she was supposed to be and for not being there for her when she needed, but upon all that, she hated her brother. The white-haired boy was not only her brother, but the person she trusted the most, the person she admired and loved the most and her hero; the day when he left the house Lily begged him on her knees not to leave, but her brother didn't listen to her. _"Sorry Lily-bug, but I must go."_ Was all that he said. He didn't even look at her eyes when he said that, he just turn his back and walked trough the door. Her brother left her; the only person she looked up, the person she needed the most to protect her and take care of her… In that moment Lily realized that she was alone; she couldn't count on her elder sisters because they gave up time ago. Now was everyone by themselves.

Lily felt a bitter taste on her mouth; she balled her hands into fists and clenched her teeth.

She woke up from her thoughts to realize that she arrived to the hood everyone called "Black Market", because there were not only addicts and dealers or cheap taverns, but many others "stores" where you could buy from weapons to mercenary services. Lily didn't know how she ended up going to that kind of site; maybe it was because of the time where her mother forgot to pick her at the middle school and she decided to walk home, losing herself in the way and ending in that dangerous site. Or maybe it was because of that girl she met outside the school selling cigarettes; Lily became her friend, and she introduced her in that world. Unfortunately, Lily suddenly stopped seeing the girl outside the school; when she asked in the black market a man said that a black suburban kidnapped her and since that day she hasn't been around there.

The teen put her hand into her pocket, revolving everything as she looked for something, when she found it, she took it out; it was a pack of cigarettes. The girl opened it, but when she saw there only was her lighter, she crushed it with her hand and thrown it behind her. The blonde turned in a corner and walked straight, and in her path she passed several locals a sixteen years old girl should never know, like Roy's tavern; that place was a pit of alcohol for the local drunks that smelled like sweat and pee. Even some of the clients were sleeping in the banquet. Next to that place was a cheap whorehouse which Lily couldn't remember the name, but almost all the clients were the drunks from the tavern or fat guys from other parts of the city that went there because either they were too stingy to go to a better place or they had small problems. At first, Lily didn't understand how those places even get some income since all their clients are the poor bastards that live there, but eventually she realized that those places are sponsored by the Mexican gangs that sell their shit there.

After walking for some time, Lily finally arrived to the place; trash, beer bottles, cigar butts, used condoms and syringes were all around the ground, making it hard to walk without stepping on one of them. The park consisted in some threes over tall grass, some benches occupied by homeless men, and a bridge that crossed over a pond of green water with trash floating in the surface. The benches, the bridge, and almost all the walls were covered in spray, with paints about the Mexican gangs of the zone. Lily had no time to appreciate the pieces of modern art that surrounded her; she only came to this place forgotten by god for one reason.

She went deeper into the park, ignoring all the vulgar things the homeless were yelling at her. Some others were asking for a something she could share with them, but Lily ignored them just like the others, and kept walking. She knew that showing money in public, especially in that place, was not a good idea; if someone knows that you have money you might become an easy target for burglars.

She walked towards a kiosk in the center of the park, which was also covered with spray and dirt. She walked trough the stairs, and when she arrived to the top she spotted a man covered by shadows; Lily reacted quickly, and with a calm face, she put a hand on the combat knife she was hiding on her waist. The man walked forward to step out of the shadows and his face was revealed by the light. Lily recognized the man, relaxing a little and unhanding the blade.

"Hey, Doggo." Lily said. Doggo was one of the many dealers that lived there; the guy was tall, had brown hair, and was dressed with a leather jacket, jeans and boots. He was the right-hand of the Mexican cartels in charge of that zone, which gave him power and advantage over the other dealers.

"How are you Lily?" Doggo said, just as calmed as the blonde.

"I'm fine." Lily replied. "I need more stuff."

"Normal or specials"

"Both." Lily said.

"Alright." Doggo said as he put his hand inside the jacket; Lily saw some things in his belt, such as a knife, a walkie talkie, and some other stuff, but what caught her attention was a gun he had attached at his belt. Lily had never used a gun, and honestly she was kinda afraid of them, but she knew Doggo would never use it against her. After some moments that for Lily seemed like hours, he took out an unopened cigarette pack, and a smaller box which contained five weed cigarettes. "The price of the tobacco increased, but I'll leave it to you at the normal price."

"You're the best, Doggo. Here you got." Lily said, giving the dealer a well folded $20 bill, so anyone spying on them wouldn't suspect. The man took the cash and went again in the shadows. Lily looked at everywhere to see of someone were spying, but luckily she saw no one, so she just left the place as quick as she could.

She opened the pack to grab a cigarette and then put it in her lips, using the lighter she lit the white cancer tube. Giving a drag, she felt as the smoke filled her lungs, the nicotine flowing in her blood and taking out all the stress she had from her house. Soon the sensation of relaxation and calmness dominated her.

Lily followed the path she used to get to the park; she passed a dark alley between the tavern and the whorehouse, when suddenly she felt as a pair of hands grabbed her by her arm and pulled her into the shadows. One of the hands slammed her violently against the wall while the other was over her mouth, preventing her from screaming.

"Don't even try to resist, girl!" The guy said as he tried to hold Lily. "Gina didn't want something with me tonight, but that's her loss because I just found something better…" The guy said as he introduced his hand under Lily's shirt, touching and squeezing her breasts. The horrible smell and the rancid breath told the girl that it was one of the drunks from the tavern. Lily knew what she had to do, so she let the guy do what he wanted, letting him down his guard.

That was his mistake.

Lily grabbed the knife hidden in her waist and held it tight while waiting for the perfect moment to strike; the guy opened her shirt, revealing the girl's smooth and soft white skin, along with her small breasts that were showing up because the guy lifted her bra. Next, the drunk unbuttoned her pants using the hand with which he was covering her mouth. Lily saw his moment, and as quick as she could she stabbed in the guy.

The guy felt as the sharp blade was going through his skin and his muscle, which made him release the girl and step back; Lily took out the knife, and watched as the guy grabbed his belly in an effort to minimize the pain and the blood loss. The drunken man fell, and soon a pool of blood began to form beneath him; Lily got closer with the knife dropping blood in her hand, and with a kick she put the guy on his belly. The drunken man just continued grabbing his wound while whining in pain. Lily took advantage of that by grabbing him by his hair to lift his head, she put the knife on her throat, and then she slashed the poor bastard.

The blood was now gushing as the guy took his hands to his throat in a useless effort to stop the bleeding; Lily just watched as the blood flooded in the ground, nearly staining her shoes. When the guy stopped moving, she cleaned the knife to hide it again in her waist, fixed her clothes, and then she lit another cigarette as she walked away from that place.


	2. Home

The day was coming to its end, darkening even more the sky and turning on the streetlights. In a sidewalk near a crowded street, a blonde girl was walking with her hands into her pockets and a cigarette in her lips. Right now she was passing a popular place known as "East Park", which was the most popular place to have a walk to clear your mind or walk with someone. Lily was thinking about if she should go home tonight or if she should sleep in Bonnie's house; Bonnie was her girlfriend, and sometimes she and Lily sleep together when the Loud girl is having problems with her family or when Bonnie's parents are not in home. She took out her cellphone to try and contact with her friend.

 _"_ _Hey Bonny-Bun"_ Lily typed the nickname she gave to her friend, then pressed the send button, and after a couple of minutes she received a reply.

 _"_ _Hey, Lily-loli, what's up?"_ Bonnie replied.

 _"_ _Lily-loli? Hahahaha what's that?"_

 _"_ _I still can't find a name that fits you."_

 _"_ _I'm sure you will. Hey, I want to ask you something."_

 _"_ _Shoot."_

 _"_ _You mind if I bunk with you tonight?"_

 _"_ _I would love it, but my parents are in home."_

 _"_ _Oh, I see…"_

 _"_ _Don't worry love, I'll hang with you tomorrow, kay?"_

 _"_ _Ok, good night."_

 _"_ _Sleep well."_

Lily locked her phone and put it into her pocket. Looks like that night she would be sleeping in her house. She didn't let that fact to ruin her moment; the park was s very beautiful place in the night, with decorative Chinese lamps hanging from the ceiling and the people around walking or holding hands. It was really nice, that market made her feel really comfortable. However, she could not stay there, or sleep there, and that made her sad.

She walked for about twenty minutes, noticing how the sky was getting even darker as she was approaching to a place where she didn't want to be. She hated her house for many reasons, and one of them was that always that her mother comes home from working, she comes with a bottle of whiskey and with a face of tiredness that told the little blonde that things would get bad, and whenever that happens also meant that she would be the one in charge of make dinner. Lily was resented with her sisters and her mother, but deep inside her, buried on a tomb of sadness and bitterness was the love that she feels for her family, fighting to get out.

The car was parked on the drive, which meant that mom was in the house. Lily was standing in front of the door, preparing herself mentally for what she knew that had coming, and with a heavy sigh she placed her shaky hand on the knob and turned it to open the door.

The house was as quiet as usual; the smell of alcohol was floating in the air along with dust, and that told her that her mother was already in her room drowning her sorrows in alcohol. She headed towards the kitchen to finish what she had to do as quickly as possible. The kitchen was messy, with dirty dishes in the sink and stains all over the tiles. Lily sighed and opened the fridge to see what could she make prepare, but just as yesterday she saw there was nothing but eggs and some leftovers of yesterday's dinner.

"I told that bitch to buy more food..." She said bitterly, taking some eggs and closing the door. Then, she waked towards the shelves to see if there was something she could make with what she had, and luckily there was a can of beans. It came to Lily's mind the time when they were a family when her mother actually loved her and when her sisters were there for her. Those memories were all she had from her family, because her sisters and brother left her life so fast that she barely remembered how they were.

She made the eggs in no time, and continued with the beans; she didn't like beans, but after spending the evening smoking she was hungry, and she couldn't buy more food until tomorrow so she wasn't in position to choose. She opened the can and then she emptied the content in the pan; she didn't enjoy the smell, but again she had no other option, so she began to mash them. After some minutes she was done making the dinner, and after serving herself in a plate she ate in silence. She remembered the times when she and her family used to eat all together in the table, telling stories and laughing. Now she would have to eat with the company of silence.

She thought about that for minutes, but as she was remembering she felt like she was about to cry. The girl shook her head to wipe away all that sentimentalism to finish her food, and when she was done she took her plate to the sink, but it was too full that another plate wouldn't fit, so she just put it aside, not caring about the pile of dirty plates with food rotting on them.

Lily walked out of the kitchen, and when she was about to go upstairs someone called her from the living room.

"You're late again." Lola said from the couch, not even bothering in turning her head to see her.

"And you were supposed to wash the dishes. Did you do it?" Lily said, not seeing her either.

"No…"

"I supposed that. Dinner is in the kitchen, go serve yourself." Lily said to finally go upstairs. Once there she headed to the room she once shared with Lisa, until she left the house at the age of fourteen; she was selected for some kind of contest of the NASA, and now she lives in Florida with her stupid scientific friends.

She was in front of her door, but when she was about to turn the knob she heard as someone call her again, this time from the hallway.

"Were you smoking that shit again?" Lana asked from the doorframe of her room.

"Yeah, why?" Lily said with a cold voice.

"Lily…" Lana wanted to say something else, but she felt as the words formed a knot on her throat not allowing her to speak. She just sighed and finally she spoke. "Nothing…" The elder blonde said before going into her room. Lily did the same, getting in and closing the door behind her.

Her room was the same as it was when she was years ago when Lisa still lived there, but this time it had some parts where the paint was falling and posters about bands and many other things she like. It was kinda messy since she hasn't clean it in a week, but it was perfect to sleep in. She sat on her bed as she took out her shoes and tossed them aside; it was a long day, and all she wanted to do was rest to clear her mind from all the shit she's been having, and for a quicker effect she would have to use one of the special cigarettes she just bought. She took out the metallic box removed the lid to grab one cigarette, and then she lit it.

The effect took some moments to hit her, but as long as she took more drags, taking the smoke into her lungs as long as possible and releasing it with soft coughs, her body began to feel light and her mind began to feel kinda fuzzy. This was not the first time she got high, but it was the first time she got high in the house; her sisters hated the smell of weed and tobacco, so she was forced to smoke away from the house by Lola, and told to stop smoking by Lana. Her mother didn't even bother in tell her something about that habit; she either was working or was in her room drowning her sorrows in alcohol.

The girl stayed like that for a while, looking at the ceiling and feeling as if her body was flying through the clouds, but suddenly an idea came to her mind; she wanted to use something she always used when she was stressed, and it was not that the weed wasn't doing its job, but seeing her sisters always gave her a bitter flavor on her mouth. She stood up and walked towards a coffin on a corner on her room; using a special key she unlocked it and lift the lid. Inside the coffin were many things, such as a pipe, some knives she used to defend herself, her black belt, some clothed she only use on special occasions, and finally what she was looking for: her notebook.

That notebook is special because that is where she writes her feelings, almost like a diary. Maybe it was a habit that was inherited from Lucy, and to be honest, now she understood why her sister…

Sister… That wouldn't be the word she would use to describe her relationship with her; in fact, she wouldn't use that word to describe her relationship with any of her sisters, and maybe they shared the same blood, but for Lily that meant nothing.

She grabbed the notebook along with a pen, and when she was about to close the coffin she saw something that reminded her not about any of her sisters…

But her brother.

She saw Bun-Bun, Lincoln's old stuffed bunny. She didn't even remember when she got it or why, but something inside her chest began to ache. He grabbed the stuffed animal and held it in her hand, feeling its softness and watching how the fabric have decolored with time; she didn't remember when the last time she held it was, but something she remembered was that the toy was bigger, and almost covered her entire hand. She stayed watching Bun-Bun for some moments, until something called her attention.

"You and Lincoln use to be very close, even more that Lola and I." Lana said from the frame of the door. Lily quickly turned her head as she tossed the stuffed animal into the coffin and slammed the lid.

"I don't remember anything." Lily said coldly. "What are you doing here?"

"The smell told me that you were…"

"So what if I'm doing it? You're gonna stop me?" The little blonde said with a daring tone.

"Lily, I know we've done many mistakes in the past, mistakes that maybe caused you suffering; we cannot reverse things, but you don't have to act like this. You don't have to self-harm you with those shits, you're better than this." Lana said in a comprehensive tone and walking towards her sister, placing her hand on Lily's shoulder. Something inside the latter wanted to take away her Lana's hand, but something even stronger wanted to hold her, hug her, cry on her shoulder. That stronger part wanted things to be like they used to be in the past, where they were a real family.

Unfortunately, Lily wasn't a person who forgets things that easily.

"You said it, you can't reverse things, but none of you are doing anything to make it up for what you all have done either, and that's even worse." Lily said getting up and facing her sister.

"Lily-bug, I…"

"Never call me like that again!" Lily yelled, surprising Lana for her sudden change of attitude.

"I'm sorry Lily, I didn't mean to…"

"Get out of my room now!" The little blonde said with a angry expression on her face and pointing at the door. Lana understood that if she stayed there things would end up getting worse, so she did as her sister said and exited the room. Lana looked clearly hurt, but in that moment Lily was too angry to notice that. She locked her door when her sister left; that name was the one that her brother gave her in the time when they were close, but now it was like a blade right at her heart, slashing it and hurting her. And without wanting, Lana just did that.

Lily walked towards her bed with her fists closed tight and clutching her teeth in an effort to keep her tears from coming out, but she failed because a tear fell from her eyes, going through her cheek and falling to the floor. The effect of the weed passed moments ago, and soon Lily felt as many more tears were coming; the moment when she realized that she was crying, she gave up, and falling on her knees she began to sob harder.

* * *

 **A/N:**

 **Thank you to everyone who read, fav, and reviewed the story. Hope you like this chapter.**

 **UltimateSTH: I know the O.A; he told me that he wouldn't continue with the story due to work, and he asked me if I could.**

 **RCurrent: Maybe she will, may be not. You'll find out in future chapters.**


	3. Sweet Dreams

A cold wind flew through her hair as her entire body began to shake. Everything was sunk in total darkness; yet, she had a strange feeling of familiarity, as if she knew where she was. The wind raged and she shook even harder; feeling the coolness on her body made her feel just like if she were naked, and when she ran her hands through her body she could confirm, to her relief, that she was still using her pajama.

"What's happening…?" She asked to herself, trying to adjust her eyes in an effort to watch beyond her nose, but it was useless. She began to walk, lifting her hands to avoid crashing with whatever was in front of her. As she was giving shy steps, she eventually managed to feel something, and as soon as she began to touch it to identify that object, the lights turned on suddenly. With the sudden change of illumination she closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands. After some moments she slowly opened her eyes, revealing the living room of her house. Something was out of place; she knew it was her house, but it looked too… the furniture looked well conserved and the paint in the walls was brighter. Suddenly it hit her like a bullet; it was the living room when she was five.

"No! Lynn please don't do it!" She heard a crying voice coming from her mother's room, and then her parents appeared from the hallway; Lynn sr. was carrying a bag full of his clothes as he walked towards the front door, and Rita was holding him to keep him from leaving through the front door.

"Please Lynn, we can talk about it…" Rita said; heavy tears were falling from her cheeks and her sobs became cries. Lily tried to say something, but no word came from her throat; she tried to move, to run towards her father and try to stop him, but her body didn't respond to her orders. She was paralyzed as one of the most traumatizing events she lived was happening right in front of her.

"Dad! Please don't leave!" she finally said, just to realize that her voice sounded like a little girl's. She quickly took a look at her body; she was wearing a purple vest over a black shirt, a purple skirt, purple socks and black shoes. That was the outfit she used to wear when she was five.

"Lynn, think about our daughters, think about Lincoln please!" Rita tried to persuade Lynn, but he was already in front of the door holding tight the handle of the bag and closing his eyes; it seemed like those last words hit him in the right spot. However, he sighed and turned the knob, but when he was about to leave…

"Lynn!" Rita yelled; this time it wasn't a cry, but it was a daring voice. Lynn was about to walk, but Rita stopped him. "You rather support the kids of a divorced bitch than your own?"

The man stood there for a while; his wife demanded an answer and man, he would give her an answer.

"It is cheaper to raise hers than yours." He said to finally walk and leave the house. Rita fell on her knees, screaming his name and begging him not to leave, but when she saw him getting a taxi and leaving the street to never return.

Lily was still inside the house trying to process what she just saw; a wound that she thought was already healed opened and now it hurt worse. She fell to her knees and began to cry, whimpering as the tears were flooding in her cheeks and falling to the floor. She remained like that for a while, not realizing that her reality was changing again. Darkness covered everything again, but she didn't notice that; there could be an explosion and she wouldn't notice. She always thought that she already got over this, that the day when she had to face her father she would tell him everything she felt because fuck! It was really hurting her to hold that poison for so many years. But the truth was that deep inside, she was still a little and scared girl.

She finally reacted when a light came through the stairs from the second floor; she thought in walking but she was still too scared to do something. The blonde got up slowly, and before she could even give a step, she heard something that left her stoned.

"Come here, little one."

That voice… it could only be…

She didn't even notice, but the fear she felt moments ago vanished as she heard that voice; a voice that she hadn't heard in a long time, but yet it was a voice she could never forget. Lily finally could react and the first thing she did was running upstairs, but as time passed she realized that the stairs didn't have an end. She didn't care though, because something inside her, something that she felt like a warm sensation that gave her the energy to keep running, was burning in her chest; she couldn't even feel her feet, but again she was too focused in getting close to the light that she didn't realize she was now her old self, wearing the same tank top and the same shorts she uses to sleep. And after running for what it seemed like hours she arrived to the source.

Her eyes opened wide, her knees were shaking too much she almost fall again but she managed to keep on foot. In front of her was Lincoln Loud kneeling in front of… her?

"Lincoln, look!" The little girl said with a wide smile on her face. Lincoln couldn't help but return the smile at the sight of her little sister wearing a cyan dress with blank details. Lily remembered that day; it was the day when she went to the party of her friend. Lincoln bough her that dress, and she wanted him to be the first person on seeing her wearing it.

"You look even cuter than usual Lily-bug, but I think I know how you would look even better…" Lincoln said as he grabbed something from his drawer and put it on Lily's head. The boy then drove the girl to the mirror; she saw it was a blue flower that matched perfectly with her outfit.

"Lincoln… it is beautiful…" Lily said, still looking at her own reflection, putting attention at every detail on her hair.

"Maybe Lola will get angry since she worked for one hour in making your hair, but now you look much better." Lincoln said. Lily couldn't resist but hug her big brother; the boy hugged her back, and held it for some moments.

Lily dropped some tears; joy or sadness? She couldn't say because she still couldn't believe what she was seeing. The blonde was about to take a step when suddenly everything began to shake; the walls began to crack as little pieces from the ceiling were falling. Lincoln and the 10-years-old Lily weren't aware of this, so they stayed hugging each other as if time stopped for them. On the other hand, the normal Lily began to feel fear as everything was tear apart; she looked at the memory of her and Lincoln hugging and tried to run towards them, but as soon as she touched them they began to disappear like dust in the air, losing themselves in the nothing. Lily couldn't reach them, but that would be the least of her worries when the cracked floor began to tear apart, making her fall to the darkness.

* * *

Lily opened her eyes suddenly, sitting on her bed and gasping; her forehead, just like the tank top she wore to sleep was covered in sweat. She quickly began to touch her body to make sure she was awake, and once she checked it, she got up and walked to the hallway; it was dark as she expected, but it didn't keep her from walking towards the bathroom, giving shy steps to make the less noise possible. It was kinda hard since the wood of the floor was old, but she managed to avoid the noisy boards. Once inside the bathroom she turned on the lights; she checked herself in the mirror, noticing at first that her eyes were swollen, just as if she were crying. She didn't remember on doing it, but the proofs were there, and they were very noticeable. The girl sighed as she opened the faucet, and then she put her hands under the cool water, and then she proceeded to splash her face with the water, washing the sweat and the tears away. Once she was done she returned to her room, changed the sweaty sheets with clean ones, and then she lay on her bed; as time passed she couldn't get back to sleep, her mind was lost in the memories of better days, days when her family wasn't that fucked up, when she was still happy…

When she still had Lincoln.

She got up from the bed and walked towards the coffin; there she lift the lid and grabbed the stuffed animal that once belonged to the person she cared the most, to the only one she had a deep connection with. After holding it for some moments she walked to the nightstand and grabbed the lighter from the drawer, and then she went to the hallway and headed downstairs. On the first floor she walked towards the kitchen to get out of the house. Feeling the grass in her feet and the cool wind hitting the bare skin of her arms and shoulders she stood up in front of the tree, just staring at the stuffed bunny in her hand. After some minutes she lit the lighter.

"This is all your fault…"

The flame was now closer to one of the ears.

"I was happy, but then you…"

The fire was almost touching the stuffed animal. She could almost smell the smoke of burned fabric, but then she stopped; she turned off the lighter and tossed it aside.

"Why I can't…?" the girl said. Lily fell on her knees, with the stuffed animal on her hands, and then she placed it on the grass.

"Why do you have to do this to me…?" She didn't notice but now her eyes were watering; tears flooded through her cheeks and fell to the grass. She could hear herself whimpering, she could see her tears glowing with the moonlight as they hit the weeds. She cleaned her face and got up with anger, and after cleaning her knees she grabbed Bun-bun.

"Why does this have to happen to me!" she yelled at the top of her lungs to the bunny, not caring if she was heard by her family or anyone else. She was fighting to hold her tears, and after swallowing hard she tossed with anger the stuffed bunny to the ground. She managed to suppress her anger in an effort to keep herself calmed; some minutes passed before she could get rid of that sensation of pain on her chest. She had enough of it, so she turned around and began to walk. She didn't go far tho, because after giving two steps she began to feel all dizzy; the girl tried to keep walking but her legs began to tremble. Her sight grew dim and after some moments she passed out, falling in front of the stuffed bunny.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon that day; the sun was setting as the sky darkened; the streetlights turned on and the neon signs in the locals began to shine in hundreds of colors. Through the darkness of an alley, a man wearing a black jacket, brown jeans and a bonnet emerged to the sidewalk; that man had a brown beard and long hair combed back. That day specially was cold; the man was shaking as his breath was visible with every exhalation.

The man walked straight for a while, passing through the people and the vendors on the street. He had his hands on the pockets of his jacket, protecting them from the cold wind hitting his face and forming ice crystals on his beard. After several minutes walking he reached the door of a small, red building; he knocked three times, and after waiting some moments a tall man opened. He had a larger beard and was sturdy; he was wearing a pair of jeans, boots and a lumberjack shirt only, just like if he didn't care the temperature was 20°F.

"What do you want?" The man said, his voice deep with a russian accent. The other man didn't say a thing; instead he just took his left hand off his pocket and showed a card to the guard. He took it, and after reading what was written in it he gave it back to the man and stepped aside, letting him enter the place.

The mysterious man walked through a barely illuminated hallway; the floor was stained with something he couldn't tell what it was, but they were red, sticky and smelly stains. He walked until he reached the end of the hallway and met with another door; this time he didn't need to knock, he just turned the knob and entered the room.

The place was full with men sitting in tables drinking beer, smoking or just talking. Everyone in there was bad looking; they were strong, had scars, patches, tattoos or something else that indicated they were dangerous. The just walked to the bar where an old man with gray hair and a patch on his right eye was mixing something he thought it was alcohol and putting it in a cup. The brown-haired man approached him.

"Russ" he said. The man behind the bar looked at him.

"What do you want, Braun?" the barkeeper said in a russian accent. He put the cup on the bar as a waitress picked it and left. "I don't have anything right now, better luck next time."

"I'm not here for that."

"Huh? Then what do you want?" The man behind the bar said. It was weird the time when that man approached him and didn't ask for a "special work" where he would get good cash.

"I'm looking for…" He looked at both sides, and then he leaned towards the barkeeper. "I'm looking for Dimitri."

The barkeeper opened wide his eyes; not believing what he just heard. After taking a moment to fix himself, he sighed and answered.

"It must be a serious thing if you want to meet him." He said as he grabbed a bottle of vodka and serving it on a tiny glass.

"It is. Will you tell me where I can find him?" Braun said, taking the glass and drinking the shot.

"I don't know where he is, Sorry." Russ said. Brown lowered his head and sighed; he was about say goodbye, but then the barkeeper continued talking. "But there are rumors about some guys guarding some containers at the docks. I don't know what they are protecting, but maybe they might know something."

"That's enough Russ, thanks." Braun said as he handed a bill to the barkeeper. "Keep the change."

* * *

 **A/N**

 **Hello guys.**

 **First of all I want to say I'm sorry for not updating the story in a long time. The thing is that I've been busy with work, and after some health and family problems I've been through now I'm feeling ready to carry on. I will continue with my other stories as well, all in due time.**

 **Again, I apologize for leaving the story abandoned, and I hope you still want to read it.**


	4. Fear

In the morning, on a room illuminated by the sunlight coming from the window, Lily woke up suddenly after having a bad dream; her face covered in sweat with an expression of concern as she suddenly sat on her spot, panting in an effort to calm her pulse. Her clothes were damp with sweat as well, and the mattress had a big, stain she hoped was sweat too.

Lily thanked she was still on her room instead of the backyard but for some reason she felt something was different; all her stuff were in order, not a single piece of clothing out of the drawer, her shirts on the closet and her shoes in their respective box under her bed. The floor was clean, noticing that it was vacuumed, and the painting looked bright, as if it was applied recently. The blonde took off the sheets and put on her slippers, getting on her feet and walking toward the door.

Nightmares have been common for her recently; every night she lays on her bed awake, staring at the ceiling to eventually fall asleep as time passes. Her nightmares are always different, but one common thing they have is that they include her family, or the memory of her father leaving the house. The girl saw the clock; it was 6:30 am. It was still too early for her sisters t wake up, so cursing under her breath she opened the door. With a loud yawn she walked toward the bathroom; after all, she was always the only one awake that early so she never has to worry about lines for the bathroom.

After fixing herself, she went down to the kitchen and put a pan in the fire, cracked some eggs and began to make breakfast. It was weird; she remembered that last night there wasn't any eggs in the fridge. In fact, there was nothing in the fridge that allowed her to prepare a decent food. _Probably Lana went to the 24/7 last night_ , she thought.

When was it the last time when someone else made breakfast? It is her job, but she also does a lot of the chores her sisters have to do Last week, seeing that Lola didn't wash the dishes she had to do it, otherwise they wouldn't have plates and glasses to eat. And what about a month ago? She cleaned the bathroom because Lana wasn't around and the place was a mess. She knows that they have jobs and they're the ones besides mom that bring the money, but it wasn't an excuse to stop doing their chores.

While she was scrambling the eggs and thinking about how her sisters were a pair of selfish bitches, she felt the atmosphere in the room getting heavy as the temperature dropped. A shiver ran down through her spine, making her swallow hard and close her eyes hoping for the sensation to end. It took her some moments, but when she finally opened her eyes she saw a black strange object she identified as a shadow in the corner of the eye; the blonde turned her head fast expecting to see whatever it was standing in front of the sink, but in the blink of an eye that thing was gone, the room returned to normal and the temperature rose. Lily watched that place for some moments before realizing that the food was getting stuck to the pan.

Ten minutes later she finished eating, and after placing the plate in the sink she saved the food and went upstairs.

"Food's in the stove! Don't be late or it'll get cold!" She said at the last step of the stairs. She didn't get any answer, which was weird because every time she does that her sisters come down. _They´re probably still asleep,_ she thought. Lily walked toward Lana's room and knocked at the door; some moments passed but she got no answer. The blonde opened the door and a creak could be heard. Lily was surprised by this; Lana wouldn't let any door creak, she had the habit of checking every door at least once a month, and if there was a single sound coming from the hinge or a single screw out of place she would fix it.

Supposing that she left earlier than her, the blonde closed the door and headed to Lola's room; she always like to over sleep, apparently a habit she got from the time when she used to participate in pageants, so if she wasn't wrong, she had to be there. Opening the door and peeping through the doorframe she saw the same as Lana's room; Lola wasn't in there.

Their sisters never leave that early, but if that's the case, then what other reason could it be? She tried to think, but then she saw her watch, realizing that she was getting late. The blonde went downstairs and headed to the main door, but when she was about to leave she remembered there was still one person she hasn't checked on. Honestly the girl really hated to see her mother in the mornings; she would be either still sleeping and wouldn't wake up no matter how much she tried, or she would be talking asleep, cursing her and her sister for all the mistakes _she_ has done. But since Lola and Lana weren't there she had to make sure the house wouldn't be alone that early. Lily walked through the hallway in the first story until she reached her mother's room; the blonde was still unsure if it was s good idea, but… maybe she could just peep and see if she was there, that would be enough for her to leave the house with no worries.

The little blonde opened the door, peeping through the doorframe and expecting to see her mother on her bed with a bunch of alcohol bottles in the floor, but instead she found the room completely clean, not a single bottle and the bed was made. What was happening? Her sisters and mother weren't in the house, but if they left early then why they didn't tell her? Why they…

The girl snapped out of her thoughts when the same sensation she felt in the kitchen set in the room; the same shiver down her spine and the temperature dropping. She was about to leave, but then she spotted the same strange shadow in the corner of her eye. Lily turned her head as fast as she could expecting her to catch it before it leaves, but as she tried to spot it at the end of the hallway that thing was already gone, and as it disappeared, so did that heavy sensation in the air and the temperature returned to normal.

Was she going crazy? It wasn't normal to see things that clearly weren't there at the moment she tried to see them. Maybe it was due to…

The girl saw her watch and realized that it was getting late; if she doesn't leave now she'll be late for school.

Walking through the door Lily left the house with her pack on the shoulder. As soon as she got out of the house a cool breeze hit her; it wasn't cold, but yet it was enough to make her shiver. They were supposed to be in summer, why was the air cool? Now the weather's acting strange. Luckily for her she was using a long sleeved shirt, so with no more time to lose she walked towards the high school.

When was it the last time she walked to school with her sisters? In elementary school she used to walk with Lisa, Lola and Lana, and when the latters graduated Lisa was the only one that could make her company on the lonely way to school. The genius eventually skipped three grades when she was supposed to pass to 4th grade and in a matter of days she was in middle school, leaving her on her own. Her mother started to drive her, but at that time she was still hurt for what her father did. Due to that all those times she took her to school were really uncomfortable, with her mother not even talking to her, just staring at the road with a sad expression in her face. Lily knew she was still mad, but not mad at dad for leaving but mad at her, at her siblings because thanks to them she lost a man who didn't think twice to go living with a cheap whore and her bastards. How did she know that? She found out the day when she went to their house to confront dad but instead she found the bitch fucking another man in the couch.

All those thoughts were invading Lily's mind, getting her sadder as each memory played in front of her, as if her mind was playing a really bad joke. She didn't notice she was tearing until small drops started to fall to the floor, running through her cheeks from her watery eyes. The girl whipped the tears away and tried to think on something else; it wasn't worth crying for those bastards. Thanks to them her life was the mess it is now, and crying about that wouldn't make it any better.

The girl saw her watch again, noticing that she had only fifteen minutes left if she wanted to make it in time for school. Following the normal way would take at least twenty minutes, and only if all the traffic lights were in red allowing her to cross running the crosswalk. The other option was to cut through Newberry Park; that way she would save at least ten minutes, the only bad thing about it was that it didn't have any path and she would have to walk through weed and tall grass, finding bugs and maybe snakes.

7:50

Lily jumped a metallic fence and got in the abandoned park. The grass wasn't as tall as she thought it would be, and luckily she was using jeans and boots, allowing her to walk better. The blonde went straight forward a couple of feet until she finally found a pathway; it was really weird because she had went to that place several times but never found it, she thought it was covered in tall grass since the park was abandoned about ten years ago, but seeing time was running she didn't think twice and started to run through the path.

Advancing some yards, the blonde started to feel that damn sensation again; the atmosphere getting ticker and the temperature getting cold. The girl tried to ignore it, but as she was advancing that sensation didn't stop following her. Lily decreased the speed; the environment was so heavy it cost her keep running and the cold didn't help either. Before taking a little break she started to walk; she kept her path for what seemed to be hours without reach the end of the park, and after looking at her watch Lily noticed that the time was still at 7:50.

 _This thing must be broken…_ The girl thought. She tried to fix it pressing the correspondent buttons to access the setting screen on her watch; while she was doing it a noise coming from the bushes could be heard. Lily stopped what she was doing and turned her head to the place where the noise came from, but after deciding it was just her imagination she turned her attention back at the watch. After some moments the noise could be heard again, drawing the blonde's attention at the bushes. Lily stared at that place for some seconds, waiting for something to come out and do something, she was prepared for this kind of situations with her old reliable combat knife hidden on her waist; if that thing comes out and attacks her, she would have 20 centimeters of cold, sharp steel ready to sink deep on its flesh. After a couple of minutes waiting for something to happen, without any results, she decided to forget about it and continuing walking, but at the very moment when she took her sight off the bushes the noise came again calling her attention; this time she didn't only heard the noise but also saw as the bush started to shake. The girl quickly put a hand on the shaft of the knife, taking a few steps back to put some distance between her and whatever the thing on the bushes was.

"Who is there?!" the blonde asked, but no answer came. Lily began to walk slowly towards the bushes without letting down her guard at any moment; if that thing wasn't coming out, maybe a little help from her steely friend would give it a reason. When she was close to the bushes, they started to shake again, making her back off again. "Come out and face me, fag!" The girl shouted again, and again there was no answer.

That situation was getting weirder as time passed, so she decided to leave whatever it was alone and started to walk. That damn and strange sensation of heaviness in the air was following heras well as the cold temperature, but she decided to ignore it; she had lost too much time already trying to figure out what that thing of before was and her watch was broken, only showing the same hour when it broke. Lily advanced for some minutes; her mind didn't leave behind those thoughts about her family as if it wanted her to suffer. You know what? She wouldn't let it win; she would endure it all just like she's been doing for so many years. Because if her mind win, then…

" _You can't escape…"_ A voice that came like a whisper from nowhere said, paralyzing the girl in that instant; a shiver ran down her whole body as cold sweat came down from her forehead. She wanted to run but her legs weren't responding; the girl felt as if the temperature decreased even more causing goosebumps through her body, but she found out that it wasn't just her mind because with every breath she took, a warm cloud of stream came from her mouth. The girl didn't want to admit it, but she was scared.

She was focused in getting away; her legs shaking as her muscles tensed in an effort to gain control over them again, but that didn't keep her from spotting that god damn, shapeless black figure in the corner of her eye; the girl managed to turn her head, expecting that thing to disappear at the last moment, but much to her misfortune that thing didn't disappeared. All Lily could do was stay there, totally paralyzed and staring at that thing as it returned the gaze with two red-glowing dots.

 _"There's no way to run…"_ The voice she heard moments ago spoke again; this time it wasn't a whisper, but a deep voice that echoed in the walls of her mind. Lily was now terrified; tears were flowing from her eyes as her body shook harder.

After what seemed to be a lifetime she finally managed to move her body, but instead of running from that god forsaken place she fell on her bottom. Lily tried to back off, crawling through the weed and grass until she felt solid, dry ground. The girl was so focused in that black thing she didn't realize that her surroundings had change; the grass and all the trees were sinking as if they were being dragged to hell. The ground turned into dry, dead soil, and in matter of seconds she was in something that seemed to be a desert under a red, cloudless sky.

Lily wanted to run; she was so terrified that didn't realize her tears were flowing like waterfalls from her wide open eyes. But yet she couldn't; she wasn't paralyzed as moments ago, but something deep inside her was keeping her from moving, from doing anything else but stare at that horrible thing.

 _"You want to know who I am?"_ The deep voice said with a calmed, yet terrifying tone. Lily stopped shaking, but still terrified she nodded shyly. The figure started to change its form, decreasing in size and getting some colors. When the figure finally adopted a shape, Lily was speechless as the thing turned into...

Her

"N-no…" That was all Lily could say.

In a big, white room filled with hospital stuff such as monitors supervising her vital signs and a serum holder with a full bag connected to her, Lily was sleeping in the bed; in her left arm she was connected directly to the serum bag, and in her face an oxygen mask was transporting the vital gas to her nose. Sitting in a chair beside her and holding her hand was Lana, who was slightly crying at the sight of her little sister, connected to a bunch of stuff that hospitals use to keep alive dying people. The elder Loud didn't know what had happen; last night she was laying in her bed awake, thinking in a way to get close to her little sister without her getting angry. The blonde wanted her to stop doing all that bad stuff and see that even when their siblings left, she stil had a sister to rely on.

Suddenly, a slight yet audible scream coming from outside took her out of her thoughts. The blonde got up as fast as she could and ran down the stairs skipping two steps at time; that voice screaming seemed familiar, but she refused to believe what her mind was telling. What she found once she reached the source of the scream made her pale; her little sister was lying in the grass, breathing heavily from her mouth as her eyes were open and almost rolling all their way up. An intense fear invaded Lana, who called 911 as fast as she could while taking her sister carefully inside the house.

Lana put Lily's hand back in the bed, and after giving her a kiss in the forehead she walked out of the room. As the door opened she found Lola sitting in the hallway; the blonde looked as if she was crying recently, her makeup was run over her cheeks and her eyes were swollen. In her hands she was holding a cup of coffee which handed to Lana once she sat beside her.

"How's she?" Lola asked with concern.

"Her state hasn't changed since she arrived here…" Lana said, taking a sip from the coffee. The elder blonde looked as if she hasn't get any sleep; her eyes were red and under them she had bags.

"Do you think she will get well?" Lola asked.

"I don't know…" Lana said, embracing her little sister with her left arm, drawing her close to comfort her. "Only time will tell…"

* * *

A/N:

I know it's been a long time since I last updated this fic, and I want to apologize for that.

This story is not dead, and I can tell you that we're getting closer to the last chapter.


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